How To Be A Mother 8,000 Miles Away
(April 2, 2011) |
|
|
March 22, 2011 --
Shonna Miller (left) assigned to 1/201st Field
Artillery, W.Va. Army Guard helps fellow 201st
soldiers load Kuwaiti monition rounds at the
Udairi Range in Kuwait. Miller is a mother of
two from Charleston, W.Va., and faces a daily
struggle to be an engaging part of her
children's lives while deployed.
|
|
CAMP BUEHRING, Kuwait (March 29, 2011) — It
might be argued that citizen-soldiers are the
backbone of America's modern Army, deploying in
support of foreign wars while maintaining
support back home. West Virginia National Guard
soldiers specifically have witnessed a constant
deployment rotation, with many troops having
already accumulated five tours since 2001.
Included in that backbone are women, who endure
the separation from their children while
attempting to maintain a semblance of their
motherly duties thousands of miles away.
“The mother in me hurts all the time, but the
soldier in me says chin up, carry on, and get
your job done,” said Spc. Shonna Miller, of the
1/201st Field Artillery, West Virginia Army
Guard. “Those few moments when I find myself in
solitude are the worst, but it's almost a relief
to have a good cry and finally feel the emotions
we soldiers try so hard to repress.”
Miller, a musician in the 249th West Virginia
Army Band, volunteered for the deployment and
currently works as a human resource specialist
for B Company.
“One of the main reasons
for this deployment is so that we can move back
to Charleston so I can be in the same city as my
son,” Miller said. “He lives there with his
father, and because of the need for aggressive
speech therapy, I didn't want to move him to
Morgantown with us three years ago and make him
change doctors and therapists. Once I am home I
will have my son a few nights a week and I won't
have to miss him anymore.”
Emma,
3-years-old and Ayden, 6, are handling the
extended |
separation from their mother differently.
“Emma is too young to understand time and I
think she thought it was going to be like a
drill weekend,” Miller said. “She gave me a hug
and a kiss and said, ‘I'll see you later, Mommy.
I love you.' We told Ayden that it would be a
couple of months before he would see me again.
He was sad but was happy when we told him that
when I got home we would be living much closer
to him.”
At mid-deployment, Miller has
settled into the daily routine and days pass
quickly for her. While the internet isn't always
stable, it offers evenings of bliss, as Miller
often uses Skype to video chat with her
children.
“I print off coloring pages of
some of their favorite things,” Miller said. “I
will color one or two and include an uncolored
sheet for them to have fun with. They love it
and because they can't read yet, it's the best I
can do.”
As a mother, you want your
children to adapt to the separation, but at the
same time their eventual nonchalant behavior can
make you feel unwanted and unmissed, Miller
said.
“Some nights Emma will wake up and
come sleep on Mommy's side of the bed and they
have a little chat about how they miss me,”
Miller said. “It breaks my heart, but it also
helps to know that she thinks of me and I'm
still part of their lives.”
Upon her
return to West Virginia, Miller and her husband
Noah have plans to open a restaurant in
Charleston and reunite with Ayden. Miller
finishes her military obligation in December and
will pursue an education in hospitality
management and marketing.
“I have the
support of my family, and my husband left his
job to be a stay at home daddy so I can do
this,” Miller said. “A soldier is a soldier no
matter their race or gender, and a child needs a
father as much as a mother.” |
|
Article and photo by Army Sgt. Debra Richardson
1st Field
Artillery
Copyright 2011 | |
Provided
through DVIDS
Comment on this article |
|
